Diary of a Wimpy Kid has taken off at the box office and is proving once again that wimps are box-office gold. Most of our favorite characters are wimps.
Milo Thatch, Atlantis, the Lost Empire
Disney doesn’t typically create wimps as leading roles-generally, the wimps are in the sidekick category-but Milo Thatch is the exception. Atlantis was made during the tumultuous period in which Disney was trying to cater more toward the male audience. The movie bombed by Disney standards (and probably regular standards, too), but it had enough Disney magic to capture the hearts and minds of Disney watchers-mainly, girls. Milo is a complete wimp-he’s a linguist, obsessed with the idea of Atlantis and the native language. While it doesn’t mean he’s a wimp just because of his profession, take into account his skinny frame, dorky demeanor, inability to drive well (read: at all), his need for glasses (I can’t talk much-I wear glasses, but everyone knows that glasses is the universal sign for dork in Hollywood), and even though he can fix a car and do other manly-man type things later in the film, a 16-year old on the expedition team is stronger than him. But he does end up getting the princess, so it all works out. And he might not seem so wimpy after seeing this fan art.
Dr. David Huxley, Bringing Up Baby
Cary Grant’s David Huxley is a bumbling, meek professor at a museum, whose only love is his dinosaur skeleton, until the bombastic socialite Susan Vance (Katherine Hepburn) comes into his life. Poor David-sure, this is a screwball comedy, and you expect a lot of “who’s on first” type comedy at the expense of one of the character, but David sure takes his share. He can never get enough nerve to stop stumbling over words to get his points across to Susan, so he has to just go along for the ride. Ironically, it seems his nerdy way is the only thing that can get Susan to concentrate on him long enough to fall in love with him.
Leo Bloom, The Producers
In any version of The Producers, whether it’s the 1968 version with Gene Wilder, the Broadway play, or the 2005 movie version with Matthew Broderick, Leo Bloom will always be a wimp. Bloom even says it in the lyrics-“I’m a loser, I’m a coward, I’m a chicken—don’t you see?” Bloom, a meek accountant, gains the nerve to become a Broadway producer at the risk of imprisonment. But before that, he makes a mockery of himself by freaking out over his blue blanket and losing any sense of composure. However, like the other wimps on this list, he gets Ulla, the Swedish sweetheart of the story. (Sense a pattern developing with these men? They get all of the girls!)
Anakin Skywalker, Star Wars 1, 2, and 3
In the beginning, Anakin was a cute geeky kid with an interest in building and modifying pod racers. But, sadly, he grows up into a huge wimp. By “wimp” I mean “punk”, and by “punk”, I mean annoying. Instead of coming off as a villain you love to hate, he acts more like an selfish, snotty brat. By the time he’s in his early 20s, he’s lashing out unnecessarily at Obi-Wan and his wife Padmé, broods incessantly, and whines about not having enough power-power he’s not capable of controlling. I could probably include Padmé in this list for dumbing herself down to Anakin’s level, but I’ve ragged on this set of movies enough…
Wormtail, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
Peter Pettigrew, a.k.a. Wormtail is a wimp in the fact that he’s a blind leader with no ambitions aside from saving his skin. Most people would say that being a Hufflepuff is enough to classify him in the “wimp” category, but lest we forget that brave Cedric Diggory was a Hufflepuff, and he became a Triwizard Tournament competitor (SPOILER ALERT) RIP. Wormtail, however, not only decided to follow Voldemort, but he gave the secret locations of (SPOILER ALERT) Harry’s parents.
Alas, this list is highly incomplete (I would’ve talked about the wimps from Revenge of the Nerds, but I hadn’t seen that movie)-if you’ve seen Revenge of the Geeks or any other movie with wimps that was left off the list, sound off below.
I think u mean Revenge of the Nerds. Liked the article, tho’! Keep up the good work!
Changing that right as we speak! Mistakes are such nuisances.